A new thing has showed up recently, incredibly vivid dreams.
I have stayed at my parents for the past week or so, its been kinda okay. They haven’t bothered me that much mainly because my dad has been sober for the entirety of the week and a half. I write this because my mother has decided to buy a half decent single malt for the bells when they show up, I can see trouble coming but we wont worry about that right now.
I have been asleep alot, which I presume has been my body catching up with shit. When I have been asleep however, my god has the dreams been intense. Recently I have suffered a variety of trouble, I was at my big cousins place, that evening I went to sleep to experience a dream where she was a primary school teacher, the dream was we were to get the pupils on a water thing and to travel round in circles, im not long back from a nap, during that sleep I had a dream that I was 34 but a primary school pupil, back when I was a kid and joining new schools etc etc, I was sitting myself then someone came and spoke to me and I was as usually nervous and ridiculously anxious as ever. There was one where I remember a child being outrageously sick right in front of me.
The most important one is a hallucination, I remember seeing a goldman sachs advert, next thing i know I am asleep and i hallucinate a guy stepping into my room attempting to be as quiet as possible, then moving closer to me and I could see changes in the pitch black of the room, I had to physically get up and turn the light on because my brain was convinced there was a guy in my room?! What the hell is that?
I made a change aswell, I cut out the fizzy drinks and my sleep improved a whole lot more so that suggests I should maintain that philosophy. One of the things that may have triggered the hallucinations were painkillers, very damn powerful ones.
Was also speaking to Kate earlier, she is nice. I have decided she is just nice, nothing to write home about but the point is, she is nice. Only ever met her twice and there was limited conversation in that but i have spent alot of time thinking about her, most importantly not planning my life around her which helps, although when I havent eaten my emotion gets a bit out of hand so as a result i get quite intense.